I believe capturing our family legacy stories is important. Without understanding the stories of the people from our families, we might never really know ourselves – why we have the likes and dislikes we do, why we have certain traditions and more. Once we have an understanding, we can pass our lessons onto our children and grandchildren as well.
My sense is that a part of me still struggles with overcoming the feeling of “not being good enough,” to step into a greater role. Yet, just as I’ve silenced the voice of the guidance counselor who told me I’d never write, I will silence the voice of my mother, mainly, who admonished me “not to get above my raisin.’” And so too, will I turn my ear from the ghostly voices of partners who demanded that their dreams and visions be placed ahead of my own. I know it must be done if I’m to shake this feeling of being uncomfortable in my own skin. When I ask, what is it that I’m to do, and I receive an answer, I must do it – whether it’s rest, or write, or read, or move my body.
Apparently, surrender, like writing, is a practice––not something to be done in fits and starts, but to choose daily.
I just woke from a two-hour nap, one way to tolerate the record-breaking heat of this late September day. I’ve been crazy tired this week, mostly because my mind is whirling with ideas and tasks. I’ve been on Whole 30 for most of the last four weeks, so I’m not struggling with the effects of eating food that triggers uncomfortable symptoms. I say most because three weeks in, I drank wine on a girls’ night. This gathering I desperately needed, after what seems like non-stop teaching while amping up my business. My vision is expanding, and I know at some point, teaching will trickle away when classes go back to being held inside the classroom. The commute for one of the gigs would be impossible.
Whether you are a camper or a glamper, being organized and prepared can make your trips a lot less stressful and a lot more fun.
The word space has been floating in my awareness for the few weeks. With its frequent appearance, it’s time to pay attention to these subtle nudges from the Universe.
These nudges have come out of my own mouth, from my accountability partner who needed to make space in her calendar and our meeting was one she could sacrifice to get some “breathing room,” and from a mentor’s message during a group meditation where she asked us to consider the concept of making space to receive the answers to our questions. All of these and more have led to my musings. Contemplating space was cause for me to reflect upon my living arrangements, the space in my calendar, between projects, in my budget, and in my overall day.